Maura Higgins Opens Up About Her Best Friend's Death & Admits She Blamed Herself

Maura Higgins talks about the death of her close friend

Love Island finalist Maura Higgins opens up about the death of her best friend Andrew.

He was killed in a motorbike accident two years ago and she admits she blamed herself for the longest time.

'It took me a long, long time to be okay again.'

 

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Maura tells Life Magazine that she felt responsible for his death after she declined his offer to go for dinner on the night he died.

'He had finished work early and and he asked me to go to dinner with him...'

'And I said, 'I couldn't be bothered'. I told him I was in my pyjamas, I wasn't getting dressed.'

 

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'He arrived down on the motorbike. I asked him, 'Why are you on the motorbike?''

'Because he never used to drive it, and he said 'Oh, it's a good day, you know?' And then he left.'

 

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Maura's ex broke the news

The former grid girl's ex boyfriend James broke the news of his death to her.

She admits, 'It was a blur, I think I was in shock for a lot of it.'

'I didn't break down properly until late into that night.'

 

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'I was still sitting on my sofa and James was with me...'

'And I remember something came into my head and just hit me, and I couldn't physically breathe.'

'I was having such a panic attack. It took me a long, long time to be okay again.'

 

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'For so long, I used to think that if I had gone for dinner with him that day...'

'When he had asked, he wouldn't have been on that motorbike.'

 

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'My family kept saying to me, ''Maura, you can't think like this, it was going to happen."'

'But I just kicked myself for so long and got worked up about it for so long.'

'It is the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with.'

 

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Maura's perspective on life

The model admits his death has changed her whole perspective on life, 'I look at life very, very differently now.'

'I don't plan ahead too much because you never know what's around the corner.'

'You just have to live every day as it comes.'

 

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'Andrew was my rock. I know that probably sounds mad but...'

She admits, 'I even think right now that he is behind a lot of this. I really do believe that.'

 

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